Pendulum? Anybody?

Ah! The blog has been out of commish for a few weeks, my apologies! No excuse, really – just your usual busy at work, occupied at home, sleepy a lot, kinda stuff. Much has happened in the last few weeks, plenty to blog about…where do we begin?! How about I spend this week playing catch-up and blogging about the happenings of the past few weeks, and today we talk about yesterday’s doctor appointment and have some fun, okay? Okay!

Well, we had a doctor’s appointment yesterday and it went flawlessly! My labs were perfect – we are gestational diabetes free, and there was no protein or iron surplus where it shouldn’t be. Also, no suspicion of birth defects, disease or other sort of deficiency based on my blood work and tests, so we are sitting pretty right now! Which brings us to how the baby is sitting, and he’s apparently a bit of a low rider. Not in a bad way, I’m just carrying low and all in front. I took pictures the other day and I still have a “case of the disappearing baby” when you look at me from the side (huge belly), then look at me from the front (she can’t be prego, I still see a waist!). Apparently I’m measuring very big for 27 weeks, as well, which is an issue that will be explored in detail when we go in for our ultrasound next week. Which brings us to the ultrasound issues…grrr. I was supposed to have one at 21-23 weeks but was unable to schedule it due to the supreme incompetence of the radiology department at Kaiser Permanente. Doc was highly displeased yesterday upon hearing I had not yet gotten the ultrasound, threw her weight around a little bit with radiology and POOF! we have an appointment way sooner than the 6 weeks they were trying to make me wait. And this 6 week wait would have started now, and was after they were not smart enough to find the three orders placed for me by two doctors to have the ultrasound. Get your sh*t together radiology, you’re not impressing anyone.

So I guess that’s about it for the doctor’s appointment update. It was short, sweet, and to the point. I had only gained five pounds in the last 6 weeks (doctors orders, she told me to slow down haha), bringing our total weight gain to 19 pounds – and it’s seriously all in my belly. Since I am measuring big the doctor wants to see me again in four weeks instead of six so she can investigate the ultrasound findings and measurements and determine for sure if I have the correct due date. I tend to think I’ve been “diagnosed” with the correct due date, and am just carrying a big, healthy baby! We are still pretty determined not to find out the sex of the baby when we go in for the ultrasound, but I did happen upon a delightful little article in one of the 15 online baby newsletters sent to my email everyday that went through like 20 different Old Wives Tales that are supposed to tell whether you’re having a boy or girl. Here’s what they had to say, and there really are like 20…

Old Wives Tale Test #1
If you prefer sleeping on your right side, it’s a girl. If you prefer the left, you’re having a boy.
Implication: Girl. I’m a right-side sleeper until my hip hurts bad enough to wake me up, at which time I roll over.

Old Wives Tale Test #2
Extreme nausea means you are having a girl.
Implication: Boy. I never had one instance of extreme nausea, or any nausea, for that matter. I bested you this time, morning sickness!

Old Wives Tale Test #3
If your hands are dry during pregnancy, expect a boy. If they are soft, you’re having a girl.
Implication: Girl. I’ve always had soft, callous-free hands, no matter how many weights I’ve lifted or manual labor tasks I’ve completed. I put very little faith in the accuracy of this one.

Old Wives Tale #4
If you’re craving citrus while pregnant, you’re having a girl.
Implication: Girl. Haha, this made me laugh because citrus has been the only consistent craving I’ve had! There have been fleeting cravings for cornbread, candy, cereal and pancakes, but CITRUS has been my mistress (mister? What do you even call that if you’re a lady?) since day one! First it was an insatiable craving for oranges, orange juice, orange popsicles, orange tictacs – basically if it was made of oranges or tasted like oranges I wanted it all the time. Now it’s Sprite. Mmmm, I love that citrus flavor. Tommy doesn’t even ask me what I want when he goes to the store. Just comes back with Sprite So if this Old Wives Tale holds any water, it’s a girl.


Old Wives Tale #5
If altering hormones make your skin break out, expect a girl.
Implication: Boy. My skin looks better than it has in like 3 years. Living in Florida with the humidity and grossness took a huge toll and last year was probably the worst my skin has ever been in all of my 28 years. Apparently my blemish cure is pregnancy. Oof.

Old Wives Tale #6
If you feel as if you’re gliding through the day, it’s a girl. Feel like you’re stumbling around and clumsy? It’s a boy.
Implication: Girl. I’m still wearing my 4 inch heels at every possible opportunity, and am still my coordinated, easy breezy self. I will now thank my mother for instilling an urgency to have excellent posture at all times, as my posture has likely aided immensely in the balance issues I’m sure my body is currently facing with 20 pounds stacked onto the front.

Old Wives Tale #7
If your face gets fuller it means you’re having a girl.
Implication: Boy. And it’s weird because when I gain weight it always happens in my face first, and the arms are always close behind. Neither face nor arms has suffered any extra padding so far.

Old Wives Tale #8
Craving salt during pregnancy means a boy is on the way. Needing a little something sweet means it’s a girl.
Implication: Girl. I don’t think I’ve craved one salty thing.

Old Wives Tale #9
If you’re experiencing pregnant mood swings, expect a girl to arrive soon.
Implication: Boy. No real impressive outbursts to speak of. Maybe don’t ask Tom about his one, haha.

Old Wives Tale #10
If you’re carrying the baby low it’s a boy. If your bump is high, it’s a girl.
Implication: Boy. As previously discussed, I’m carrying really low. If this Old Wives Tale holds any water, it’s definitely a boy.

Old Wives Tale #11
If you’re carrying baby in front, it’s a boy. If the baby weight is spaced all around your middle, it’s a girl.
Implication: Boy. Once again, baby is just all sorts of out in front. I can’t put my make up on or do my hair in the bathroom without knocking 14 things off the sink with my belly.

Old Wives Tale #12
Swing a pendulum around your middle. If it swings back and forth it’s a boy, if it circles it’s a girl.
Implication: Too lazy to find out. This sounds like a lot of work. And who even owns a pendulum.

Old Wives Tale #13
If someone asks to see your hands and you display them palm up, it’s a girl. If you show them palms down, it’s a boy.
Implication: ?. Mmmmkay, what? This one gets the Really face. Who would ask to see my hands? That’s like something you ask a three-year-old when you know they’ve taken something and it’s in their hand, but they insist they didn’t take it. Pass.

Old Wives Tale #14
If a toddler boy shows interest in your belly, you’re having a girl. If he ignores you, it’s a boy.
Implication: Girl. I’ve been working in the merch store during our games now (air conditioned and I can sit down, yessss) and there have actually been two little toddler boys in the store who have shown interest in my belly. Yeesh, scram boys. She’s not even out of the womb yet!

Old Wives Tale #15
Eat garlic. If the scent seeps out of your pores it’s a boy. If you keep smelling sweet, it’s a girl.
Implication: Girl. I always smell sweet.

Old Wives Tale #16
If you pick up a key by the round end your baby is a girl. If you pick it up by the long end expect a boy.
Implication: No idea. This is on the same level as the “show me your hands” mistake they made on this list. What if you pick up the key in the middle? The Old Wives might need to be referred to as Old Bags from now on.

Old Wives Tale #17
If your age and year of conception are both even or odd, it’s a girl. If one is odd and the other is even you’re having a boy.
Implication: Boy. I’m 28 and the year of conception was 2009. Interesting.

Old Wives Tale #18
If your baby’s heart beats more than 150 times per minute, it’s a girl. Less than 150 you’ll have a boy.
Implication: Inconclusive. When we were in Labor and Delivery during my little scare a couple weeks ago the babies average heartbeat was literally 150. It was as high as 162 and as low as 136, but was consistently between 147 and 153. Not even joking.

Old Wives Tale #19
A child tends to be the same sex as the parent who was less stressed at the time of conception.
Implication: Could go either way. Our stress levels are usually about the same, I think. And who remembers how stressed they were last November?

Old Wives Tale #20
If you dream about having a girl while pregnant you will end up with a boy, and vice versa.
Implication: Girl. My dreams about babies are few and far between, but the ones I remember have included having a boy. And in one dream he was born fully dressed like Mr. Peanut – monocle, cane, top hat and all. I think I forgot to tell Tomas about that one. It was pretty funny. Wonder what that means…

Final Score
Old Wives Votes for Boy: 7
Old Wives Votes for Girl: 8
Seriously? Haha, the Old Wives are pretty split. Somebody find me a pendulum, stat.

The Case of the Disappearing Baby...


Wait! Where'd it go?